We Indians...

On an idle afternoon, when the government servants are enjoying the privilege of a lazy holiday at home, I sit in the impersonal office of my workplace – pretending to type something awfully important as my staff of impatient technicians work hurriedly to finish off the day’s work as quickly as possible and rush home to enjoy the festivities. A myriad of thoughts cloud my mind as I think of the traits that mark us, the INDIANS, as a unique race.

Be it a group of tea-sipping villagers huddled around a crackling fire to discuss everything from  the recent Katrina Kaif movie to the recent gossip in the neighbourhood or a diaspora of suited-booted NRIs in the heart of London ruminating about Price Harry’s affairs or the recent UN resolution, we Indians do have some common traits, beliefs and agenda which have remained undiluted over the years.

1.       Well, it was just that an expedition to India gone wrong which led to the discovery of America! For the information of those who spend each living second trying to achieve the ‘Great American Dream’,  the accurate news is that on a fine August day in 1492, the great Christopher Columbus set sail in search of the land of spices and silk in Asia and by the whirl of destiny-bad navigation-ignorance, landed on the American soil.

 

2.       Despite the discotheques, the shameless display of wealth on weddings, the Michael Jacksons looming large over Bhimsen Joshis, and despite so many other flaws with our overpopulated nation, we have a respectable number of men and women who have given up every pleasure of a conventional life to protect our borders and the nation as a whole.

 

 

3.       For every Moninder Singh Pandher there is a Kailash Satyarthi.

 

4.       Yes, Dhyanchand is remembered, Dhanraj Pillai is feted, Sania Mirza is honoured, Saina Nehwal is appreciated and above all, Dhoni has repeated the feat, but it is still the image of the good old Paaji Kapil Dev holding aloft the shimmering silver cup which makes our hearts beat wildly.

 

 

5.       The swanky multispecialty hospitals may have mushroomed everywhere, but the average Indian still has more faith in the neighbourhood Homeopathic doctor who doles out those magical sugary tiny circles of cure. Allopathy provides temporary relief, while the magic potion in the glass vials roots out the disease once and for all.

 

6.       Is it not the only country where the rhinoceros, the tiger and the lion exist in the wild???

 

7.       The songs and dances of the Indian films – can even the ‘Sound of Music’ or ‘Dirty Dancing’ beat it? In the tea gardens where films are screened on giant screens during the Durga Puja festival, the audience sometimes screams for an encore after a particularly appealing dance number, and the theatre management obliges happily by replaying it before continuing with the rest of the movie.

 

8.       We all have two moms. Yes, and before rushing to your father for his polygamous secret, hear this. One mom is the one who gave birth to you, controls whom you date, whom you marry and what career choices you should make, and who waits along with you patiently after a day’s hardwork to feed you with those energizing meals and beverages the whole night when the examinations keeps you awake all night. The other mom is the Mars Orbital Mission (MoM). Don’t both the moms make us proud?

 

9.       We hold the copyrights for ‘Jugaad’.

 

10.   It is only in India that certain special human beings are upgraded to the level of the Almighty. The ‘Godmen’,  as we call them, are nowhere else to be found.

 

The list is endless, but these ten points must have touched a chord somewhere. Sorry, if you are not an Indian, then you cannot feel it…